Jason Statham: 10 Hilariously Badass Things That Can Only Happen In His Movies

Jason Statham: 10 Hilariously Badass Things That Can Only Happen In His Movies
Jason Statham can do pretty much anything in his movies, and we mean anything. These are things that could only happen in his films. Since the late 90s, British actor Jason Statham has maintained his status as one of the world’s most popular action stars. While other actors have had ups and downs in their careers. Statham has had a consistent run. His involvement in the Fast & Furious franchise and its spinoff means he’ll still be a major force this decade. In his movies, Statham normally combines the cheesy elements used in the 80s and 90s action flicks with a modern flair. And despite being criticized for never taking on more challenging roles, he prefers to stick to his working formula. Here are hilarious things that you are only likely to find in Jason Statham’s movies.
Jason Statham: 10 Hilariously Badass Things That Can Only Happen In His Movies

10. Leaving A Message On The Phone While Falling From A Helicopter

Most of us don’t have any experience in jumping or getting thrown out of moving things but we figure that a long fall from anywhere (let alone a helicopter) will have you panicking. You’ll either be resigned to despair or if you are an expert, you’ll be figuring out how to land without hurting yourself. Well, for Jason Statham, falling is no big deal. In fact, it’s such a small issue that he can use a phone while gravity does whatever it likes to his body. In the final moments of Crank, Statham’s character Chev Chelios (cool name) falls from a chopper during a fight with a villain. While dropping fast, he still manages to whip out his phone and leaves a message for his girlfriend on her answering machine before finally landing on a car. Wow!

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9. Removing An  Explosive Under His Car With A Crane

The Transporter movies made Jason Statham globally famous and for good reason. Frank Martin was one of the best drivers to ever grace the big screen. With his Audi A8, he would pull all sorts of stunts that made you want to stand up and just clap for the man. In Transporter 2, Frank discovers that the villain Gianni Chellini has planted a bomb under his car. So, what does dear Frank do? He speeds and launches the car into the air from a ramp before spinning it to the side so that the bottom makes contact with a crane. The crane thus unhooks the bomb and it explodes shortly after. What’s even more impressive is that Frank lands on four wheels and keeps going.
Jason Statham: 10 Hilariously Badass Things That Can Only Happen In His Movies

8. Using A Car Battery To Kickstart His Heart

It’s important to note that Crank: High Voltage—the movie in which he pulls off this amazing (or ridiculous) feat—isn’t a science fiction movie. The story in this Crank sequel is an interesting one. Chinese gangsters kidnap Chev Chelios (Statham) and steal his heart before replacing it with an artificial one that is designed to only function for an hour. To stay alive, he must keep charging it. In the early moments of Crank: High Voltage, Chelios gets into an accident that destroys the battery pack he is using to charge his artificial heart. Chev gets some locals to help him connect jumper cables from his nipples and tongue to a car battery. In a few seconds, his heart is functioning well again.
Jason Statham: 10 Hilariously Badass Things That Can Only Happen In His Movies

7. Taking Out Bad Guys While Baby Sitting

In 2017’s The Fate of the Furious, Statham’s character Deckard Shaw finds himself having to rescue Dominic Toretto’s baby from the villain Cipher (Charlize Theron). Shaw gets attacked by Cipher’s men and so he proceeds to juggle between babysitting and killing everyone in sight. In a move that should have earned him a “Babysitter Of The Decade” award, he puts headphones on the baby to ensure the little human doesn’t get distracted by the gunshots. He then proceeds to take out the bad guys using a combination of fisticuffs and the Gun-Fu technique popularized by the John Wick movies. Even better is that he keeps checking on the baby after killing a man or two.
Jason Statham: 10 Hilariously Badass Things That Can Only Happen In His Movies

6. Delivering A Headbutt Without Taking Off His Cap

In the highly underrated action film Homefront, Phil Broker (Statham) is a former DEA agent who relocates to a small town in Louisiana with his daughter to live a peaceful life. In one scene when he’s putting gas in his car, a group of guys comes over to bully him. Bad idea. When one of them stops the gas pump, he decides to teach them a lesson. Most of them receive punches and kicks that make them regret ever approaching him. But the best moment comes when he headbutts one of them with his cap still on. The cap wasn’t turned back so we wonder how that one worked. But it still looked cool though.

5. Fighting While Tied To A Chair

After getting captured and tied up, most action protagonists normally have to find a way to untie themselves before escaping or inflicting punishment. Conveniently, there is always a bottle nearby or something that can be broken and used to cut the ropes. However, in Killer Elite, Statham didn’t even need to untie himself before beating up everyone. He just lifted his body up together with the conveniently light chair and went on to use his feet and head in taking out at least 10 people. Ummm… Okay, Jason.

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4. Using A Hockey Stick To Beat Up Thugs

In Blitz, there is a scene where Detective Tom Brunt (Statham) gets surrounded by a group of thugs in a street late in the night. As is the norm in all Statham Vs Anybody fight scenes, the fight ends up being one-sided. To make the scene even more interesting, Brunt explains that he is holding a hockey stick also known as a hurley. He then the thugs what the stick is used for before proceeding to make fun of the carpet knife that one of them is holding. Before they know it, he beats all of them to the ground with the stick. And he sums it up with a perfect quote: “If you are going to pick the wrong fight, unless pick the right weapon.”

3. Driving On Two Wheels… In Between Trucks

Well, even Jeremy Clarkson can’t pull that off. Or can he? During a high-speed chase in Transporter 3, Frank squeezes his car between two heavy trucks. In order to properly fit between the tiny space, he tilts the car and drives on two wheels at about 120 mph. While it might be possible to drive on two wheels at slow speeds in a controlled environment, doing so on a highway, in between moving trucks seems like a stretch. But we won’t tell that to Jason, will you? If only he can do it then only he can do it and that’s final.

2. Coming Out Without A Scratch After A High-Speed Head-On Collision

Head-on collisions can be brutal and the Tarantino film Death Proof showed us just how devastating an impact can be. However, don’t tell that to Jason Statham and Vin Diesel (who also deserves a list like this). In Furious 7, the two men speed towards each other just to show who is the man before colliding. From the amount of damage on the vehicles, most of us were preparing ourselves to sing “Na Na Na Goodbye” to the two men. However, both men come out of their vehicles without a scratch. All they do is straighten their necks and that’s it. Way to go.

1. Fighting A Megalodon By Himself

In The Meg, Stratham’s character Taylor manages to get rid of the prehistoric megalodon shark all by himself. The megalodon which is currently extinct is said to have been 64 feet long and weighed about 34 metric tons. Imagine a single man tackling such a beast by himself. Normally in movies about giant sharks, the huge creature is normally killed through explosives or a group effort. However, in The Meg, Taylor manages to stab the Megalodon’s eye and also cuts through its body with his sub. The blood attracts other sharks and they proceed to finish the job for him.

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